Tuesday, October 05, 2004

Have you ever tried to sort through a huge stack of resumes, deciding who to interview for a job? It's nigh on impossible really, 'cause it's not like anyone writes things like "My interests are getting pissed, ecstacy and surfing the net", so you have to make your decision based on sentences like "I possess strong team orientation skills and strive to show initiative". Of course you do dear.

So anyway, here I am with a stack of resumes on my desk, trying to be fair. The job that I am interviewing for is a "sandwich year" position, so all the resumes are from young people (19-20) that are all studying the same degree at Uni. That doesn't mean that they have to make sandwiches (just that this year of work experience is sandwiched in between study years), although perhaps thats a good way of sorting good from bad. I could get them all to make the best sandwich possible, and choose who gets an interview from that. Bonus points for homemade chutneys or something. These kids (I think now I am nearly 30 that I can call anyone under 21 a "kid") are all smart, they all have part time jobs, they all list some sort of volunteer work. They are all like these little perfect angels.

I have found myself turning to "Interests" to try and get a feel for what they are like and if they will make the shortlist. This wasn't really helping, everyone loves to keep fit and help old ladies accross the street, until I found one young man, who under "personal achievements" listed that he was part of the mass group nude photo taken by Spencer Tunick in Melbourne. You know, where it is ridiculously early in the morning and all these people show up, take off their clothes and then lie on the dirty ground near city landmarks. (I wonder which ass is his?) Do you think he included that because it demonstrated how he can get up early? Or how he is willing to move outside his comfort zone? Or that he is an exhibitionist? Or that he is very well endowed and wasn't worried about an early morning cold snap diminishing his package to be captured on film forever? Some people are strange..

And as for how I have decided who to interview, of course I've just picked the ones that are the best endowed.


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